Missing my Lola still

My cousin Paul just posted a video of pictures of our family on my mother's side. It started with my late Lolo Pablo and Lola Maring. And then my mom and her siblings and their families, including my cousins and all the apos (grandchildren). I cried after watching the video even when I'm at the internet shop. Missed my Lolo and especially my Lola Maring terribly. She died December 28 2008. She was the main reason why I go home to Iloilo whenever I can. I was 7mos pregnant then with Sarhi when I got the news. Since Jojo has work, I went home with MJ and Ysa for her burial. I was not able to give my piece at her eulogy for I might get into labor so I asked my brother Jay-r. One time I'll write what I wanted to say. I'm still not over her passing, still mourning. But I'm comforted that she's watching over us whereas before she just hears some news about us for we live too far from her. I still got her picture in a frame, wearing her usual 'daster' taken at her old home before it was rebuild for a sturdier one. Hay, missing her again..

Not in the (wedding) picture

I was told that when I was young, my mother would ask me why was I not in their wedding pictures. They said I would cry my heart out everytime they asked because my reply was that they left me at the house during the event. Actually I was not even born yet for they were married on Jan and I was born December the same year.

Now, to my kids. We have a large wedding portrait hanging on our stairwall. Almost everyday, Sarhi or Ysa would mention their Papa upon glancing at the picture (who would still at work). One time I asked MJ the same question. Initially she answered that we left her. Eventually she said that she wasn't born yet, that she was still in my tummy. To correct this, I told her she wasn't even in my tummy, she was still part of my ovary ehhe. She forgot to ask what ovary was (good thing, whew!). Funny to do the same joke to my kids.

Healthy eating..or at least trying to

When I was young, I never really liked vegetables except squash. I remember the time when my father was so angry with me for really resisting to eat winged bean with coconut milk. He covered my rice with the viand and I can't leave the table until I'm finished. Afraid of his anger, I tried to eat it. My eyes widened as I looked at my plate..it's delicious! Well that started my journey (often not successful) with vegetables.

I have always been a meat eater. I love 'em, gotta have any meat included in my meal, either as the main ingredient or just for flavor. But things changed these past few months. I had been (forever)writing my thesis proposal. Can't seem to make the right one my adviser would approve. The lastest one I wrote was about antioxidant activity of selected leafy greens. I was able to read quite a number of studies on antioxidants. Though my proposal did not push through, I am happy to announce I'm a convert (but not entirely). The nutritional and health benefits of fruits and vegetables were way beyond what I knew that I now have a different eye for the lowly vegetables and seasonal fruits I see at the market or stores everyday. I have been introducing vegetables to my girls, either eaten as is (cooked as part of a viand) or hidden (as in the case of grated carrots in spaghetti with red sauce). I'm proud to say that they eat them or try to eat them (especially MJ who has preferences). Ysa and Sarhi like to gobble up cooked chunks of carrots, potatoes, cauliflower or broccoli whenever served. But now my weekly menu has changed. Whenever I can, I cook 2-3 vegetarian/vegan main dishes per week (aside from the daily vegetable side dishes). So far everyone liked them. Our favorites were indian tofu/squash curry, barbeque tofu burger/sandwich, chicken ala king (actually the vegetables were the star for I put just a small amount of chicken that it's barely there), and my forte, chop seuy. Still trying to meet that 5 servings of fruits and vegetables per day, but getting there ;)

Colors and running around

Last night before having dinner, my Sarhi started climbing the stairs (again, she always does). Following her lead, the other 2 sisters excitedly went up to their room. MJ was searching for some toys in the toy box, Ysa was about to choose a book and Sarhi, well, she has started emptying the toy box (one of her favorite games). As there were newly washed and dried clothes all over the place, I made up a new game for them. Calling out "Find the color ___", the object of the game was just to find and touch any item with the said color. MJ and Ysa happily run around holding on to clothes, a bag, a pillow, glass window (Ysa did it for the color black, it was night afterall ;) ), even Sarhi as I called out the colors. Sarhi giggled for her sisters embraced her as I called the color yellow (she was wearing yellow shirt). It was a simple and fun game. My girls enjoyed it that Ysa wanted to play again after dinner ;). Ahh, they are so easy to please ;). Got lots of kisses and embraces after - the best part.

Messing with the hair

I love my daughter's long straight hair after her father's (actually I also envy her at times for my hair's wavy and frizzy). But last thursday night while combing her hair, she got this idea of twirling the comb on her hair at the front. So that's what she did, she rolled the comb several times on her hair until it got stuck. The hair was so entangled that I can't even move the hair even an inch off the comb. Frustrated I asked her why she did it, she said she just wants to curl it. Ahhrrrr.. I said (half-jokingly) that she has to go to school either bald or with a comb hanging on the side of her face (just laughed at the thought of her with the hanging comb). Got no choice, I decided to carefully cut her and make her a bangs. It was distressing as I looked at the (more-than-a-)handful of hair falling off my hands. I know, I know, hair grows back but it was my daughter's lovely hair! Finally after cutting her hair, she looked just like when she was 2 years old (she's almost 6yo now by the way), only bigger. At first she was worried that her classmates would laugh at her when they see her but I comforted her and told her not to tell anybody how it happened. The following day, after I fetched her from school, she happily said that her teacher liked her new hair. Good thing her new look kinda grow now on her.

Rite of passage of being a parent

To become a parent, there is no college program that you can take and graduate from. Good thing now one could attend a seminar how to take care of a baby or toddler, or even join a support group. However, teachers (or trying to be) can come from anywhere from your neighbors, older relatives, friends who have older kids especially your own mother and mother-in-law who share their experiences how they raised their child/children. But to really experience raising a child or children firsthand and make decisions based on what you think is right and good for your kid/s are what really matters. All the cries and shriek to sweet smiles and giggles covers the initial part of being a mom, and still there's a long way to go. Every parent got to walk through this rite of passage, eventhough it is often exciting and scary at the same time.